pain

The pain inside is unbearable
Part of me wants to leave this pain
Part of me wants to stay and fight
It's twisting inside
Physical pain on the outside
Staying in bed all day
Sleeping the day away
I'm only up to make dinner and go to the bathroom
I barely shower
I have to be told to take care of myself
I have to be told what to do and when
They are getting tired of taking care of me
I don't blame them
I would be too
I'm tired of being me
I'm tired of the pain
I just want it to disappear
I need an outlet
Should I cut
watch the blood pour from my skin
It's so beautiful as it drips to the floor
The pain is temporarily gone
Ultimately it will come back
This is useless
How do I make it go away permanently?
Only one way out
Down the bottle of pills
No!!
Stop!!!
Fight!!!!!
You deserve to live
You deserve to love
Fight with everything you have
Eventually you'll win